The awkward state of affairs of our acquaintanceship.

(Written in a conflicting, unwanted relationship.)

How do I describe the feeling... It's the on and off conversations. It's how you seem to only talk about your common point of interest i.e. work. Truly, you don't know how to feel about them. You pray it all blows over and rejoice when it seemingly does. You are forever guarding your heart, from everything. Telling yourself it's nothing the way they look at you, dismissing their dms and private stories saying that they are just over-friendly. You honestly wish you could distance yourself from them so whatever it is goes, but you can't.

I don't know how to act when they enter the room, I wait for them to break the ice. I know they couldn't possibly feel that way and that there's nothing on my end but it's just the weirdest place I've ever been in & I want out.

I tell myself almost daily that if they wanted you, they would have pursued you. They would have had you. Keep your head up keep pushing through & I promise I'll believe in you even when you can't find it in you to.